Dearest Maine-

Thank you so much for understanding. I think finding a more permanent place for my family and I was a terrific decision on your part.

I feel like our relationship has been reinvigorated and I am ready to recommit to you one hundred percent.

You made the right decision, I won’t let you down.

Love,

Andria

Well Maine, I think it’s time we talked.

We’ve been together for a few months now and it’s been beautiful.

You’re fun, you’re stunningly gorgeous, and great with kids. 

It’s just- I really need something more permanent. I want to feel like I have a real place here and not just some space where I store my stuff. I know, maybe it’s that I just move too fast for you and I get that.

I get that commitment scares you because so far all I’ve seen is your warm, bright fun loving side. You’re afraid that once the cold sets in, once we’re done partying, I’ll cut and run like most people do.

I want to be the person who stays. I want for you to give me that chance, but it has to be soon. I can’t stay in limbo for another six months while you make up your mind.

I adore you, but I have to know where you stand- and soon.

This is the first place I’ve ever been…

…where socializing really makes the difference between success and failure.

Sam tried for months to find a job through placement agencies, online, and by canvasing his resume. He finally found one by striking up a conversation with a woman at a local convenience store.

We’ve been looking for a permanent place to live through craigslist and by calling numbers on “for rent” signs with no luck. Yesterday, at his new job, Sam’s boss said she’s going to put him in touch with a guy who owns lots of property in town.

We left a bag with about $80 worth of stuff on the local bus. Figuring it was gone, Sam asked one of the drivers we’re friendly with what number he would call if he lost a bag. The driver said “Oh, is it a Target bag with some speakers in it?” It was! So then we see him about 45 minutes later on his route, he honks and beckons Sam over- and hands him the bag (he had gone and gotten it from the office). Just so cool.

High tide!

Wow…so…wow!

We’ve been in Maine for about a month now. Sam’s job (which he had lined up) fell through at the last minute. I’m still frustrated by that, but what are ya gonna do?

We had some savings we planned to use to try and get a food cart going- but we’ve wound up living off of that while looking for work. It looks like Sam has a job at a pizza place, which is great- an income is an income!

Juniper is in school and (mostly) settling in. I’m not sure how much of it is registering- he’s been upset off and on that some of his toys aren’t here and he can’t see his uncle whenever he wants to. We’ve had some behavior issues- self harm by biting his fingers very hard and potty training regression- but considering the massive changes he’s just undergone I think he’s doing great!

We love his school and I’m so glad we decided to try settling in Old Orchard first instead of going straight back to “city life” by moving to Portland.

The pace is a lot (a lot) slower here than we were used to in Dallas, and there’s been a fairly healthy level of mistrust (part of what’s making getting work difficult I think) but all-in-all most people have been friendly and helpful. We’ve been spending so much more time out and enjoying the fresh air, beach, and quiet pace here! Even with all of the financial worries I am convinced we did the right thing!

We went to Portland today!

It was lovely, we spent most of our time in Old Port sitting at the wharf, stopped into a fresh seafood market, visited Port Bean (favorite coffee shop so far), and checked out the library. I wanted to take pictures but as I am a genius and totally professional photographer and stuff- I left my camera memory at home. 

*wah wah waaaah*

As much as I enjoyed feeling “civilized” again (Casblanca Comics! City Buses! Traffic!) I have to admit that Old Orchard Beach felt like a sanctuary to come back to. Juni and I walked along the beach to get back to our room, picked up some sea shells, and had fun running from the waves as tide was rolling in.

More and more I can’t see myself living in a place that’s not very close to the beach. It’s difficult to describe how the ocean makes me feel- calm and like all is right with the world. When I’m listening to the ocean, all of the anxious voices in my head just shut up and I feel peaceful.

Making a living seems like it’s going to be trickier out here than it would be in the city, but I also feel like we have more opportunity to be creative and settle in to a community. Sam has decided that tech work is just not something he wants to do (unless it’s on his own terms and as his own boss)- which worries me a bit but I feel like I should be supportive. We’ve uprooted everything else for a dream, why not shoot for being our own bosses?